By Jake Sanders
With a forward by Sue-Ellen Sanders
We're well within the weeks of what is sure to be a long, hot summer.
This year, my 13-year-old son is determined to make money any way he can. I was having an almost-senior moment sitting in front of the computer keyboard trying to write a column for this week's issue, when he suggested he write it for me.
For a fee, of course.
I'm feeling somewhat sloth-like tonight, with an overdue craft project that's calling my name. So, here's Jake.
I started this summer with high hopes of earning a lot of money, and paying my parents back for that giant bill from my cell phone "Instant Messenger"
service. Really, I didn't know it would cost $17 bucks to instant message all my friends on one long night of play rehearsal and another $30 in game downloads. Who knew they could add up so fast?
Why, I thought I would make hundreds. And even though I hate to admit it, most of my ideas to make money have been merely get-rich schemes that I may never carry through.
It's very hard for someone my age to get money, because businesses won't hire me because I'm too young (even though I'm more mature than most of the people at McDonald's).
So I tried almost everything, and, so far, what have I got to show? Diddley squat!
First, I tried my hand at mowing lawns, even though I dread mowing my own lawn. I created awesome fliers with color pictures and cheap prices, and handed them out the first week of summer. I thought me being a "cute little kid" would bring customers by the dozens. It was a gimmick, of course.
I have about 30 houses in my neighborhood, and I can guarantee that every person has seen one of these fliers. I've had many responses to them. Just not anyone who wants to pay me to have their lawn tended.
People think I'm too young or the yard is too big, and it would be too hard for me. Boo hoo! I have done much more than lawn work, and let me tell you, I can do it!
So, I still sit waiting for a call about someone leaving on vacation wanting me to mow their lawn.
Total earnings: $5 (from mowing my own yard).
Next, I tried dog-sitting. Again, I made colorful fliers with pictures of cute dogs on the front. Yet another gimmick failed me.
I placed them everywhere. The service was cheap and wonderful. For only $7 a day, I'd play with the dogs, feed them, and walk them for hours. Why, if people wanted me to watch them for a seven day week, I'd even give a special deal-- I'd only charge $35! But no, everyone decided to board their dogs instead. How rude!
Total earnings: $5 (still)
Now it comes to this, writing my mom's column for money. I am good at blabbering on so this is perfect for me; I can earn some easy money, and give everyone my 2 cents' worth. It's about the only thing that has worked out for me this summer, money-wise.
It is wonderful to do this. It works two ways: I get some quick cash; my mom doesn't have to write her column. (Speaking of which, it takes me a lot less time then it takes her, as I'm a fast typist).
I recently had an awesome idea. You know those posters that say stuff like "Teamwork," "Confidence" and "Inspiration?" I'm going to make them, but with a catch. I'll only be making ones that say, "Awesomenicity," and you get your face on it! Only $10! What a bargain.
I just thought I'd mention that so if you wanted to learn more, you could know.
So what's the moral of the story? If life gives you a mom with a column to write, charge her and write it for her!
P.S. If anyone would like any of these services, I'll still take your money, I mean, I'll still work hard for you.
Sue-Ellen Sanders writes a weekly family column for the Hometown News. Her son, Jake, will do (almost) anything for money.